The Vintage Automobile Club of Ocean County, NJ welcomes you.
On my hosting days at the Vintage Auto Museum I’ve been watching a
DVD of old commercials. I received the DVD set for Christmas a couple of years
ago, but until now, I never watched them. This three DVD set contains over sixteen
hours of all kinds of commercials: food, toys, cleaning products, clothes, cars and
other things. Mostly, I’ve been watching commercials about toys and food, since
they are the commercials I relate to most. Remember Maypo? Kid Cheerios? And
how about those cereals that had “Sugar” written right on the box? Sugar Pops,
Sugar Frosted Flakes, Sugar Jets? And they all promised to give us kids “extra
energy”. Well of course they did. They were full of sugar! One bowlful of Sugar
Jets and you could fly around the room like Peter Pan!
There are also a great many commercials for girls. Dolls, mostly. There’s
one doll—I think it’s called Patty Playpal—that’s as tall as a two year old. The
commercial shows a little girl opening the front door and there is Patty standing
outside with a fixed smile. It’s like having a sister, except that this sister never hogs
the bathroom. Then there are the dolls that grow hair. It doesn’t actually grow hair;
you have to pull it out of the doll’s head. Right out of the skull! The hair can be cut
or styled, although, I’m pretty sure there is only a limited number of times you can
pull and cut the hair before the doll is permanently bald.
Then there’s the doll that actually grows. It begins as a cute little doll
named Kitten, but then it grows to be a teenager with tattoos and a nose ring and
dates a guy doll named Dirt who has a motorcycle and they both ride off and don’t
come back for two years and give you a baby doll that you have to now take care of
because Kitten has to pursue her career as a County Music Star but the best gig
she can get is at a bar called Fatty McFarty’s. I don’t think that doll sold well.
Toys were so gender specific. Boys played with guns and cars, and girls
played with dolls and Easy Bake ovens. I liked the Easy Bake Oven myself. My
sister had one, and she could actually bake a small chocolate cake. After I had
pestered her for most of the day to make me a cake, she thought she’d teach me a
lesson. She gave me what appeared to be a rainbow cookie, but after two bites I
realized it was Play-Doh.
The toys that really amaze me are the weapons that can fire plastic
projectiles. Pistols, battle ships, cannons, tanks, planes. Remember Fanner 50? I
had that, and I also had the Rifleman’s rifle. Can you imagine a kid taking one of
those toys to school these days for Show and Tell? Not only would that kid get
expelled, but the whole family would be run out of town. I was a big fan of Hopalong
Cassidy. I had a gun and holster set just like Hopalong, which I wore everywhere,
except to church, and no one ever expressed surprise or worry at an eighteen year
old wearing a pair of western toy pistols. I suppose parents today, and society in
general, are afraid if their kid had a toy gun, he would grow up to be a homicidal
maniac. I mean, heck, I had all sorts of shoot-em-up toys, and I turned out just fine.
Now with Christmas upon us, I wonder what kind of toys kids will be asking
for. I know most kids will want something electronic. God forbid they should open
a present and find a basketball. They’ll probably ask how to turn it on.
Well anyway, I want all my friends and fellow Club Members to have a
wonderful holiday season. Do it, or I’ll shoot you.
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information about local shows & events in our area.
John Mahoney - President
Gary Stabile - Vice President
Denny Derion - Secretary
Everett Ross - Treasurer
Marge Kurtz-Cusack - Sunshine
Denny Derion - Membership
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